Should Be Your Top Priority
by Della Menechella
Improving self-confidence might not be high on your priority
list, but if it isn’t, it should be. As a spiritual woman entrepreneur, you are
meant to feel good about yourself and to feel worthy to receive life’s
blessings. However, if you don’t think well of yourself, not only will you
suffer emotionally, but you will also be limiting the amount of good that you
allow into your life.
What is self-confidence? It is (1) a feeling of trust in
one’s abilities, qualities, judgment, (2) confidence in one’s powers and
You might not have been lucky enough to be born into a
family where others supported you and strengthened your opinion of yourself. So
improving self-confidence might be something you aren’t used to doing. While
you can’t change your past, you have the power to change your future. And one
of the ways that you can change your future is to make improving self-confidence something that you work on every day.
of Improving Self-Confidence
- Higher Self-Esteem – When you believe in yourself, it helps
boost your self-esteem. You know that you aren’t a victim of life’s
circumstances. You can change things that you don’t like and you can achieve
the things that you want.
- Positive Attitude – Improving self-confidence can lead you
to have an overall positive attitude about life. When you have a positive
attitude, you expect things to work out well for you. And your positive
expectations will go a long way toward helping you achieve your goals.
- Less Fears and Doubts – When you aren’t sure about
your ability to accomplish what you want, you’re likely to be filled with many
fears and doubts. You might be afraid of making mistakes and you will likely be
overly concerned with what other people think of you. When you work on your
self-confidence, you will probably attempt to do things that you haven’t done
before. You will realize that even if you make a mistake, it doesn’t reflect on
your worthiness as a person. You will also feel less stress that constantly
harboring fears and doubts can generate. You will feel a greater sense of peace
- Improved Feelings of Self-Worth – You will only allow as
much good into your life as you feel you deserve. Too many women don’t feel
like they deserve more of life’s blessings. There is an abundance of good that
is ready to show up in your life, but if you don’t think much of yourself, you
block the amount of good that you will experience. When you feel worthy and
valuable, you help remove the blocks that are standing in the way of your
- Better Relationships – When you feel good about
yourself, you will attract people into your life who value and appreciate you. These
healthy relationships help boost your own opinion of yourself. When you like
and appreciate yourself, you will be able to share yourself more freely with
- Improved Performance – If you are constantly filled
with self-doubt, it is going to have a negative effect on your performance.
Even if you have talents and abilities, when you are worried that you aren’t
good enough, you will not be able to let yourself shine. Research has shown
that when you believe in yourself, your performance level will improve.|
- Be Authentically You – When you feel comfortable in
your own skin, you can let the magnificent woman that you are shine through.
Worrying about what others will think about you can be exhausting. Being
authentically who you really are is so liberating, and it allows you to share
your gifts with the world in a way that only you can do.
- Increased Resiliency – No matter how capable you are
or how much you plan, sometimes negative things just happen. When you have a
high level of self-confidence you are not thrown off course by life’s
challenges. You know that you have what it takes to overcome them. You will be
able to take a breath, regroup, and handle the challenges successfully.
- Fulfilling Your Life Purpose - You are not an “extra”
in life. There never has been and there never will be someone like you. The
Universe created you to do something only you can do. When you believe in
yourself and feel valuable, you are more likely to share your gifts with the
world. You will be willing to be the person the Universe created you to be.
You are not an “extra”
in life. There never has been
and there never will be someone like you.
Tips for Improving Self-Confidence
Here are some tips that can help you increase your
confidence level. Start working with one and then add others as you move
- Focus on Three – Every night before you go to sleep,
come up with 3 things that you’ve done well. I learned this technique from a neuroscientist,
and it is a very powerful practice. Instead of looking for things you didn’t do
well (like many of the women that I coach), force yourself to find 3 things
that you’ve done well during the day.
- Change Your Physiology –Your mind and body are
intimately connected. When you change one, it automatically affects the other.
If you are feeling unsure of yourself, you are very likely holding your body in
a way that is causing you to feel tentative or uncertain. Change your physiology
to a posture that will support you in feeling confident. It is one of the fastest ways that you can go from feeling uncertain or
unsure of yourself to feeling confident, positive, and self-assured.
- Be Kind to Yourself – Too many women are so hard on
themselves. If they make a mistake, they tell themselves, “What an idiot I am!”
or “How can I be so stupid?” They treat themselves so badly. You want to be
kind to yourself. Treat yourself the way you would treat your dearest friend or
- Set Achievable Goals – One of the best methods for
improving self-confidence is to set achievable goals and to work towards them.
These can be either business or personal goals. Set a goal that is a stretch
for you, but you believe that you have a good shot at achieving it. Then set up
a plan and take consistent action towards that goal. When you have achieved it,
recognize your accomplishment, and feel proud of yourself for a job well done.
- Be a Duck - Don’t worry about what other people
think. Ducks have a gland that secretes a wax-like substance. They coat their
feathers with this substance, so water rolls off their backs. Be like a duck
and let other people’s negative comments and criticisms roll off your back. I
keep a plastic duck on my desk to remind myself that I can let other people’s
negativity roll out of my mind like water rolls off a duck’s back.
- Surround Yourself With Positive People – Spend time
with people who lift you up and believe in you and minimize your time with
those who sap your energy. Life is precious, and you deserve to be around
people who care about you and who help you feel better about yourself.
- Move Beyond Your Comfort Zone – If you always stay
within your comfort zone, you will never grow. You should regularly be doing
things that are a stretch for you. You can plan to attend a new networking
event, find an opportunity to speak in public, or approach a potential client.
The more often you do things that are a little uncomfortable for you, the
easier it becomes.
- Recognize Your Accomplishments –So many women
minimize their achievements. They say things like, “I haven’t really done
anything special.” I’m sure you have had many successes in your life, and it’s
time for you to acknowledge them. You aren’t coming from a place of ego when
you do this, but from a place of gratitude that you were able to do many things
- Lean on the Divine – One of the best ways of
improving self-confidence is to work on your spiritual connection and to partner
with the Divine. When you commit to having a Divine Partnership, you will
always be supported in whatever you do. It takes a lot of the stress away from
trying to figure out everything on your own. The Divine loves and adores you
and is always ready to help you accomplish your heart’s desires.
One of the most important reasons for you to make improving
self-confidence a priority in your life is this -- you will be happier overall.
Life will feel easier and more joyful. You will feel that you are important and
that you matter to the Universe.
Whatever your level of self-confidence is now, you can improve it. You were created to enjoy your life to the greatest extent possible. Work on valuing and appreciating yourself, so you can create a space where all the blessings that are waiting for you can flow into your life.
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